Kyiv Hipster

I was born and raised in Kyiv. Sure I did. Why else would they have called me Kyiv Chicken? But this time I'm not gonna talk about myself. Kyiv Hipster is the character who's blowing my mind. Who the hell is he? I see this guy day and night sitting in a fancy café with his laptop. He drinks alternative coffee, that mysterious chemeks or something. Regular coffee is too ordinary for him. He manages to attend two concerts per evening with a highly intellectual lecture on urbanism in between. He promotes healthy lifestyle. He regularly donates blood. He runs all possible marathons and half-marathons. He volunteers. He radiates positive energy and is 99.9% vegan. He eats everything organic and wears everything organic. He trims his beard in a trendy barbershop. He wears designer's looks. Young adults want to follow him. He's an up-to-date hero. He's been to 50 countries, discovered inner peace and defeated all his inner demons. He doesn't need a life guru, he's already one. All this relates to hipster females too, except for a barbershop. You might think I'm jealous. Sure, I'm. The only thing I can't get about him: does he ever work?